I went to the library the other day to pick up some books that were on hold for me. Out of habit, I stopped at the Self-Help/Spiritual section for a quick look before going to the check out counter. One book JUMPED out at me. I pulled it down and read the title. It wasn’t really my kind of book but something in me knew I had to get it and read it. The book is called Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America and for me checking out that book was a little like sitting down with the intention of watching Fox News. I mean for the past three years I’ve felt and spoke of how finding The Secret and books like it changed my life for the better.
I’m over halfway through the book and can’t believe how many times I’ve nodded in agreement with the author (Barbara Ehrenreich). I just finished the chapter titled “God Wants You to Be Rich.” In that chapter Ehrenreich even mentions my own church, Unity, but focuses on the mega-churches like Joel Osteen’s. A lot of these Pastors are living like kings and queens and pass along the message that that kind of lifestyle is exactly what God wants us to have. We should ask and expect God to give us big houses, fancy cars, and other expensive extravagant stuff. (This was a huge focus in The Secret which was my big criticism of it.) It seems they’ve moved from what we can do for God towards what God can do for us.
If I had to put into words where I am on my spiritual journey now, I’d say it’s not where I was a year or so ago. I specifically remember writing someone an email where I said “God just wants us to be happy!” That friend didn’t have time for an appropriate reply but promised to write more later. He never did but I can now imagine what he might have said. That brilliant insight of mine wasn’t very brilliant. Assuming that most of the stuff people do to feel happy is very egocentric how does that benefit anyone else, or God for that matter? If God does in fact want anything from us, it’s got to be bigger than just our personal happiness.
But I realize now that I got that idea from all the positive-thinking, self-help books I was reading at the time. I’ve always had moments of doubt about the Law of Attraction. There are things that don’t add up. Is it really fair to say that someone has attracted rape, abuse, schizophrenia, poverty, and cancer into their lives with their thoughts? Many people would say yes but I have a difficult time accepting that in good conscious. What I am more likely to believe now is that maybe we do create a life-plan for ourselves before incarnating. The challenges that come our way are put there for our soul’s development and we as earthbound humans can’t quite understand the real significance.
I do believe we have life purposes and that we figure that out as we go. But I don’t think everyone’s purpose is to prosper or be happy. Sometimes great changes happen in response to the suffering of another. Which brings me to my latest realization. If God wants anything from us, I think it is to serve in whatever way we can. I buried my head in the sand for a long time so that I could stay peaceful and happy. I was peaceful but completely ignorant of what was happening in the world. I was out of touch with reality. Various things have come along in the last two years that should have forced me out of that bubble. But somehow through all of it, I remained “positive.” Lately though, I’ve been looking closely at the world again and a lot of it is f*cking ugly. I can’t deny that. I can’t visualize that away. And I don’t want to bury my head again. I have realized that one thing I can do right now is arm myself with knowledge and shine a light on the injustices I see all around me. Every time I’ve done that on my blog in the past I’ve felt fearful, but lately I’ve wondered if maybe that fear is telling me this is exactly what I need to be doing.
I think I’ve finally realized that I don’t want to live a life devoted to Self-Help, but rather a life devoted to Helping OTHERS. And if I dare to wish for anything I’ll wish that I am presented with ways that I can do just that.
Originally published on Leslee Horner’s blog, Waiting for the Click , on April 3, 2011.
5 Comments
Despite of all of my books that i have read i know that this book really help me make mine I am so excited about that so just keep up the good work and keep up the books I like your books.
(also posted this on fb) For me, the more I see of many very prosperous people, or people who are striving towards it, the more I understand the Bible verse about it being difficult for a rich person to enter heaven. IN FACT, in many cases, having a lot of money is more of a challenge than being “middle class,” and I wonder what lesson the “rich person” is here to learn. It certainly isn’t an indication of an overall “successful person.” Yes, rich people can be spiritually evolved but it’s not b/c they are rich! But, in American society, I see all kinds of behavior excused just b/c I person is “good” with money.
Thank you Leslee… For sharing your experience and also for that distinction about helping others. I want to have a prosperous business that doesn’t drain me, and there’s a lot of room to craft exactly what that will look like for me.
Thank you A.Z.D. for the comment. I do think there are true nuggets in a lot of the stuff (or even most in most of it) it just sometimes or a lot of times gets lost in the “cotton candy.”
Almost spit out my orange juice when I read, “I’ve been looking closely at the world again and a lot of it is f*cking ugly” You said it, I agree. I too have had a love/hate relationship with the self-help genre. Sometimes they are great motivators, help you get organized and cheer you up, but they also can contradict each other and condone egocentric and selfish behavior. It was a joy to read this honest, spirited and enlightening post. Thank you, Leslee Horner for sharing your personal journey and Jennifer for giving you this forum.